Hey everyone. I just wanted to announce I plan to head over to Blogger myself. That's where a lot of my blogging friends have gone, and I think I'll go check it out myself.
It's December now. I haven't posted anything in a bit, so...
I'm almost finished with my Christmas shopping already, which is kind of nice.
The holidays haven't really come out swinging in my house just yet. I guess we're still trying to recover from the Thanksgiving seige.
I remember when our house was a lot more packed for Thanksgiving. For whatever reason, we've been hosting it for as long as I can remember. We'd have at least 20 cousins around (the bigger parties were at our old house several years ago.), and almost all the uncles and aunts and grandparents.
It's a little quieter now, since our lives have gotten a lot busier since we were kids. They're still good times, though, and I wouldn't trade them for anything.
We're going to my Uncle Joe's at Christmas, probably. I really like his house. He's got a nice sound system that's always had Christmas songs on it, not to mention the shelf that stretches around the entire top of the room displaying his collection of rare and strange beer cans.
It's a cool collection. I wish you could see it.
We'd play pool and chat and just enjoy each other's company. I'm really looking forward to it.
We've got a Christmas party coming up this next Sunday at work. This should be...interesting. It's supposed to be an 80's dance party.
What that has to do with Christmas is beyond me, but whatever floats your boat. They'll have other people there, which is nice. Most of the people I work with are guys, and it just doesn't work when two straight guys dance with each other. If you're gay, that's probably a different story. I wouldn't know.
Anyway. I'm not sure if I'm going to go just yet. But we'll see.
I've got an interview in New York coming up next week that I'm looking forward to. It's about a 5-hour drive, but I like road trips so this should be fun.
Gotta go get something productive going today. I'll catch y'all on the flipside. Whatever that means.
A girl, we'll call her Jill, told me last night her heart doesn't long for me.
Happy Thanksgiving to you, too.
In her defense, she really did wish me a happy holiday before dropping the bomb. That was nice of her.
I've liked Jill for some time. I do hope she's reading this because she knows who she is, and I mean every word I say here.
Jill's a really nice, kind and gentle girl, very pretty and a better listener than often times I deserve. She's been a great support through a good amount of drama that's transpired over the past few months or so.
Seems that's gone now. It's my understanding that she never wants to talk to me again.
What did I do? I know that's what you're asking yourself as you're reading this. I'm not sure. I don't know if I'll ever know if it was anything I did. I just know she doesn't like me anymore. It's possible she never liked me.
Honestly, I've kind of been in her shoes. I know how hard it is to fess up something like that. I sensed something like this a long while ago. It's a fun little talent, really.
Why didn't I say anything? Because I figured she was just busy with school, you know? Preoccupied. How was I supoosed to know what was going on? If I asked her, it'd just show a lack of confidence in us, right?
Don't even get me started on confidence issues. I really don't want to talk about that today.
What's done is done, but it doesn't make it hurt less, you know? Jill, you know who you are, and if you're reading this, my lines are always open.
To say I'm tired of that phrase would be to say that The Big Bang was one of those little paper poppers you throw on the ground.
The subject of the nice guy's been brought up in a couple of different circles of friends, and always has to do with relationships.They all tell me I'm a nice guy, and while I have plenty of moments where I feel a lot less than nice, I've pretty much come to believe them.
There are a number of girls who will tell you I'm not very good at relationships. I'm not proud of that. I have yet to have one that lasts over four months, and for a majority of them, that was my own fault.
I'm not really looking for someone right now, but I do like to feel attractive once in a blue moon, you know? I like to think that maybe that cute redhead that comes in to eat every now and then would find me cute and funny. Or something equivalent to that.
It'd just be nice to be reassured that I've got some redeeming qualities and that girls still (?) find me attractive. I keep feeling I've got something that keeps them away; that freaks them out or causes them to emotionally (and maybe physically, although I have yet to see it) recoil like a frightened cat. I'm just not sure what.
What puzzles me is how guys who are, excuse the term, complete jackasses can keep one or sometimes more girls just flocking to them and hanging on them, and all the while the girl complains that their man is treating them badly.
Is there some sort of cologne I don't know about?
I've come up with a couple of theories.
1. We live in a culture of victimhood. We all like to think we're the underdog fighting against the man. Don't lie to yourself. I feel that way at times. In a strange and twisted way, we enjoy being the victim of something. That way we can gain further acceptance and support from our and get our ego stroked. That's all well and good in times of trouble, but in a bad relationship I'd well imagine it becomes like an addiction.
I'd like to go on record and say I've been blessed not to have more than one bad relationship yet. My love life's rather short, but I can't say I haven't enjoyed it.
2. People don't have to be attached if their partner is a complete jackass, so they can essentially have them at their disposal. When it gets to be too much, off they go. The J.A. thinks they have control, when quite the opposite is true. This can apply for both sexes, but I've seen it more often in women.
3. The other person believes they can "fix" the J.A. It's much like the great Ron White said, and I agree with him: "You can't fix stupid."
4. It may be great physically, but otherwise the relatioship's trash. Whatever. I never really delved into that.
5. Chivalry's dead. I don't know how exactly it died, but it stopped being expected. Somehow, forms of abuse became the new chivalry.
I'm a nice guy, ok? The Good Lord knows I can be the biggest J.A. on the planet some days, but overall...
My friend Tonia told me I'd be good for a woman, but not for a girl. Just my luck I'm a 23-year-old with the mind and soul of someone much older.
I don't know. It's unfair, frankly. It just plain sucks that the jerks rule the planet. I can't in all clear conscience become one, though.
I literally can't make myself attempt to change into that bad boy all the girls are looking for. It kind of makes me wonder who would notice anyway.
It's unfair, like I said. I know God's probably got someone out there for me, and I'm fine with that. If not, I'll be just as happy single. I just like to feel attractive, and I don't right now.
Until the day comes where I might find that girl (woman. probably woman at that point.), I'm ok. Really. You jerks run on ahead and let me finish last. I'm not sure why it is we're racing to begin with, but whatever.
To the women out there, and to the few men who have sought me as an advisor or a firing post, I'm still here for you. If you just need to vent, by all means you can. If you need advice, I'll give it to you so long as it doesn't fall on deaf ears.
Good morning, internet readers!
I've noticed my blog's been getting a few more hits than usual, which is really nice to see. Thank you all for reading!
Being that I seem to be getting more readers, I wanted to throw out there that if any of my regulars (again, I'm not sure who you are when you read this, but if you're a regular reader, that's cool) would like to receive e-mail notifications when I update my blog, you can shoot me an e-mail by clicking on the button at the very bottom of my blog. It's a big, flashing "email me" sign that's kind of tough to miss.
All right. Well. That's all for now. I've got to get to work here. Thanks again for reading!
-Adam
This, of course, means nothing to me as I will be sleeping while millions of poor saps around the nation will be trampling each other to snatch up the biggest and best deals stores have to offer.
You can have your thrill of the hunt. I'd rather catch a few more winks, myself.
I was asked today who on my list is the hardest to shop for. I'd have to say any women. Any woman on my list.
I don't like malls. I feel uncomfortable in them (much like a tuxedo). To me, a mall is almost a completely different society than what I'm used to. The people are different, the code of behavior is different and I just don't feel I fit in. It may be the way I dress, the way I talk or just the way I am, but something about being in a mall just tells me I don't belong there.
Now let's take an already awkward situation and triple it with these facts: 1. I am shopping in a woman's store/section. 2. I am buying woman-y things. 3. Do I just not get enough of the heebie-jeebies from those department store clerks? Or the kiosk salespeople?
Oh, additional funny story.
I was in the mall today picking up a few job applications (I'm looking for a simple change of pace from the restaurant scene) and this guy from some kiosk who was selling spa treatment stuff (you know, manicures and the like...I don't know) stopped me and tried to sell me some manicure kit. It like cleans your cuticles or something.
I can hear my female readers laughing from here.
I humored him because that's just what I do. I find it difficult to just walk away from someone, no matter how uncomfortable they make me. To make a long story short, I came home with a few applications and a shiny left thumbnail.
Yes. I'm not sure how long that's going to last....
I've been having strange dreams the past couple of days. I'm not sure what it is exactly that causes it.
The other night I had a dream where I was getting ready for a cruise to Jamaica (Nice island, by the way. I was there a few years ago) and just as I was about to board the ship, I realized I forgot to tell work I was leaving.
The just last night I had a dream that I heard one of my ex's (let's call her Marge) was in danger. In real life, I didn't treat Marge very well, so that made it stranger.
Anyway, I heard she was in danger, and she was somewhere far away. After a while I tracked her down. She was rather surprised to see me, and as it turns out she wasn't in danger after all, but was really touched that I would come to her rescue.
Well, today's the big day, internet people. I just came back from voting, and let it be known that I'll do my best to tone down further political commentary and try not to run five straight entries as I have in the very recent past.
It's fine if you disagree with me. I'm not an expert or anywhere near the smartest man alive. Thanks for enduring my rants, regardless if you agree or don't.
I said my piece and stand by what I said.
It's funny that the fate of the nation is to be decided on such a beautiful day outside. It's so warm and about as sunny as a day can come. The trees have a crimson and gold fire about them, making an already bright day even brighter as the sunlight reflects of the beautiful falling leaves. Never have I seen death more beautiful.
I think it's God's way of saying "Hey, it's going to be just fine. I promise you, I have everything under control." And maybe His way of saying He's a USC fan.
Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to take a couple of antacids, get back to work and hunt that stinkbug (I know it's in here...I heard it...)
Nice to be able to shake this off if just for a moment.
